Another Abandoned Work… Taryn, The Legacy

So this is another one… sort of a sequel to Magnifica. I’m currently working on a whole new series and am sort of cleaning house with old ideas that frankly, I haven’t been able to go anywhere with. This is the most recent one, which actually came close to being a complete story before I just ran out of steam with it. These chapters are in extremely raw form due to the incomplete nature of the story. They are not edited. Enjoy, but remember, it’s incomplete, so don’t get your hopes too high…

I

Darkness surrounded Taryn as her breathing became more rapid. Her head darted back and forth as she looked for any sign of life, “Hello? Is anyone there?”

No response.

“Hello, hello?”

An odd sound appeared in the distance, it was little more than a whisper, but nothing that she could make out.

“Is someone there?”

The voice grew louder and the darkness began to fade. At that moment, a pair of red eyes appeared in front of her. The darkness was fading fast now as a man with pointed ears and long black hair appeared in front of her. Goose bumps appeared on her skin as she took a fearful step back. Her heart raced as though she had run a great distance, “Who are you?”

The creature’s mouth open as it continued its menacing gaze. Its eyes burned as bright as the campfires she’d sat around in the woods of New Hampshire when her high school friends had gone camping. The creatures dark hair made them appear even brighter.

A high pitched scream was the only response she received as the creature suddenly moved forward and passed right through her. She covered her ears, trying to block it out, “Who are you, what do you want?”

As the creature passed through her, the pain of the scream became intolerable. She squeezed her eyes closed and cried out, hoping she’d be heard over the screaming, “Stop it!”

“Whoa, Taryn, are you okay?”

Taryn gasped as she opened her eyes, “Bobby…”

“Easy, sounds like you had a rough ride.” Bobby replied as Taryn slowly sat up. “What happened?”

She rubbed her eyes before turning to him, “It was the same as before.”

“The dreams again, huh?”

Taryn nodded, “Now I’m glad I left my door unlocked. I keep seeing this man with pointed ears. I don’t know who he is, but I feel like he’s important somehow. It’s strange.”

Bobby’s lips twisted thoughtfully, “Pointed ears?”

“Yeah, like the pictures we saw in biology…” She replied. “I think he might have been some kind of elf.”

“You mean a half elf?”

“No, his ears were very pronounced.”

Bobby frowned, “Taryn, the last elf died a few years ago. Other than half-breed and such, they’re completely extinct now. You of all people should know that.”

Taryn nodded and ran her hand over the point of her own ear, “Yeah… don’t remind me. Even so, that’s what I saw. I can’t explain how, but I’m certain he’s an elf, and not a half-breed, a full elf.”

“Maybe your own Elven senses are playing tricks on you?”

“Maybe.”

Bobby smirked as he got to his feet, “You should probably get up. Your hair’s a mess!”

Taryn ran a hand through her dirty blond hair and brushed it back behind her ears, “All right, all right… I’m up, now leave me alone!”

She looked over at her clock as her feet touched the floor, “7am… well at least I have time for a shower.”

Bobby nodded, “I leave you to it then.”

“Thanks.”

The moment Bobby was gone from the room, Taryn stripped out of the sweat-soaked pjs she was wearing, grabbed the towel hanging off of her bedpost, and headed for the bathroom. Gross…

The hot water pouring over her skin helped wake her up. Her hazel eyes widened as her newfound energy flowed through her. A cloud of steam surrounded her as she washed herself down. She took a few minutes to savor the serenity. College had always been something of a rollercoaster ride for her so she appreciated any moment of peace she received.

Thankfully, classes were wrapping up for the summer. At which point, she would need to go find a job if she wanted any spending money for the summer. It wasn’t something she enjoyed, but she knew that she needed to. Her parents had provided everything for her up until this point and had even taken out a mortgage on the family home to make sure that she would make it through college debt-free.

Knowing that did not make life any easier for Taryn and she refused to take another penny from her parents as a result. Her goal was to graduate, get a good job, and eventually pay the mortgage to make sure that the house would always remain theirs.

She grabbed the towel and dried herself off before moving to the bedroom to get dressed. She pulled open her top drawer to the usual assortment of underwear and grabbed a pair of hip huggers. Normally on a Friday, she’d go for the bikini briefs, but she didn’t have a date or any plans for the evening, so she wasn’t looking to impress anyone. She quickly slid the underwear over her legs before reaching for a bra.

Once she was dressed in her normal black capris and white blouse, she went about fixing her hair. The shower had worked wonders. Her hair was very thin, so combing out the knots wasn’t difficult. Her ears were slightly longer and more pointed than that of a full human. It was something she relished as keeping her hair tucked behind them was much easier.

Finally, she turned to her small make up case. I don’t think so. She thought to herself, not today. Taryn wasn’t a huge fan of makeup and often just went without it. Lipstick and maybe some cheek blush were about all she’d tolerate if she was going on a date, but even then, she’d often just wipe it off later.

At that moment her eye caught the digital clock on her desk. 7:45

“Fuck!” She blurted out. “I’m going to be late!”

Without a thought to her book back, she dashed out the door, down the steps, and out the front entry way. With a clear path, she dashed across campus to the main building. She was determined to minimize her tardiness.

The warm breeze that passed over Taryn’s skin was no comfort to her as she ran. The grass around her was slowly returning to green as spring was quickly giving away to summer. Typical Boston, she thought to herself. The seasons here change so quickly.

Taryn arrived at the main classroom hall with barely a few minutes to spare. The building was a large brick structure with gold lettering on the side that read ‘Arcanus University.’ She immediately proceeded inside.

She quickly made her way down the hall to room 103 and took her seat. The room was a large auditorium that seated about a hundred people, but only thirty seats were occupied. Either the class wasn’t very popular or they were just using a large room due to lack of space.

Taryn favored the back of the room for reasons she could never quick figure out. She sat down and pulled out her books as a portly dwarf sat down next to her, “Hey Taryn.”

“How are you, Merrin?”

The dwarf shrugged, “Can’t complain… much.”

“Did you break into that rock salt vodka again?”

“No…”

“Merrin?”

“Maybe…”

Taryn shook her head, “You know you can’t handle that stuff. It blows right through you!”

“Hey dat shit be dwarven-made!” Merrin replied. “I can handle anythin’ my people make. Rememba that!”

Taryn chuckled, “Okay Merrin…”


Readers,

Do you have a question about writing, publishing, my stories, etc? Please feel free to post a comment or email me.
jimthewritingwizard@gmail.com
I’ll use those comments to select my next blog post.

I have been writing for several years, have 4 published works, experience with publishing and independent work, so I can hopefully be of assistance.
Please note, I only do one of these a day and will do my best to respond to everyone, but it may take some time.

Also, feel free to check out my works of Fantasy and Historical Fiction, Available on Amazon and where ever books are sold. See the link below:

http://www.amazon.com/James-Harrington/e/B00P7FBXTU

Thanks friends!
Catch you on the flip side!

-Jim

From My Writing Playlist #Music #Metal #Writing

Temperance is insane in some of the stuff they put out. Highly recommend giving them a listen.

When to listen:  This is a high stress, high pressure song. Listen to this when writing either during the final battle or during a high stress time, perhaps the initial conflict or something like that.



Readers,

Do you have a question about writing, publishing, my stories, etc? Please feel free to post a comment or email me.

jimthewritingwizard@gmail.com

I’ll use those comments to select my next blog post.

I have been writing for several years, have 4 published works, experience with publishing and independent work, so I can hopefully be of assistance.

Please note, I only do one of these a day and will do my best to respond to everyone, but it may take some time.

Also, feel free to check out my works of Fantasy and Historical Fiction, Available on Amazon and where ever books are sold. See the link below:

http://www.amazon.com/James-Harrington/e/B00P7FBXTU

Note:
If you have read my books, PLEASE log into Amazon and post a review. I really love to hear everyone’s thoughts and constructive criticisms. Reviews help get my book attention and word of mouth is everything in this business!

Thanks friends!

Catch you on the flip side!

-Jim

Review: Star Wars: LOST STARS Manga Vol 3 #StarWars #Review #Writing #Fantasy

The conclusion of the thrilling manga adaptation of Claudia Gray’s Star Wars Lost Stars novel! What does destiny have in store for Thane and Ciena?

  • Series: Star Wars Lost Stars (manga) (3) (Book 3)
  • Paperback: 200 pages
  • Publisher: Yen Press (November 12, 2019)
  • Language: English
  • ISBN-10: 1975358678
  • ISBN-13: 978-1975358679
  • Product Dimensions: 5 x 0.6 x 7.5 inches

 

Okay, you all know my love of Star Wars and how rarely I do book reviews. Let me preface this by saying that I am a fan of the Lost Stars story. I did a review of it previously which can be read here, and the second volume of the Manga, which you can read here…

Though I did not do a review of the first Lost Stars Manga Volume, I will admit that I loved it. The story stayed true to the original novel, the art was well done, and for a fairly cheap price, it was a good buy and a good read… for the most part. The second volume wasn’t quite as good as the first. It was shorter and skipped quite a bit of the book. So how does the third measure up? Well… Let’s get into the nitty gritty, shall we?

Setting:
As with the novel, this part of the story picks up right as everything is geared up for the Battle of Endor. Key places include various Star Destroyers, the Endor, Naboo, and the Battle of Jakku.
Cienna is a low-born farmer from a fairly backwards area on the planet, while Thane is considered more of a noble birth from the same world. They’re not meant to get along, like each other, or even speak. Yet crossing their classes isn’t the only obstacle these two have to overcome. In the third volume, we delve into Thane leaving the Empire and joining the Rebellion while Cienna feels compelled by loyalty and her duty to keep her family safe, to stay with the Empire.
As the Empire continues to lose ground, their losses show in Cienna’s injuries and her lifelessness. She grows skinny, her eyes are shaded and her lips chapped. This whole time, Thane believes her to be dead.

What I liked:
Honestly, this story really goes a lot more into Cienna’s feelings toward the Empire, it covers her descent into nothingness and we get to visually see the toll her duty takes on her. By the end of the book, she’s emotionally drained, thin, badly scarred, on life support, exhausted, and no longer wanting to live. This is incredibly powerful.
The anime style is very well done, just as well as the previous books.

What I didn’t like:
My complaint here is not much different from the ones in the other books. This is pretty much an abbreviated version of the novel. The idea that a picture is worth a thousand words just doesn’t hold true here. The Battles of Endor and Jakku, two events that were major plot points in the book are barely glossed over here. We really don’t even SEE the Battle of Jakku in this volume as the story is focused on the bridge of the Inflictor.
Another powerful scene where Thane get’s sick and is counselled by an officer that later turns out to be Mon Mothma, one of my favorite scenes, is cut out completely.
Whoever edited this book’s story boards to turn it into a graphic novel didn’t do a very good job. You immediately jump from Cienna getting promoted to right when the Star Destroyer get’s boarded and Thane shows up to take Cienna off the ship. Literally there is no transition to tell you that you’re now seeing the Battle of Jakku… which I suppose makes sense as you really don’t even see it.

Story:
I went over the story in the last review, so I’ll spare you. I included the links above if you’re interested.


2.5/5 Stars
It really kind of hurts me to give it such a low review. Don’t get me wrong, the illustrations are incredibly well done, the story is gripping and getting some more detail into the characters was a nice treat…
Sadly, the book is shorter than the other two volumes and noticeably shorter than the first one. It cuts out key points, character developments, and the transitions from scene to scene are almost non-existent to the point where you’re confused as to what’s going on. The manga seems to assume that everyone’s already read the book and that should not the case. These should be standalone for new readers to be drawn in.
Is this worth reading? Hell yes, but before touching this series, I’d recommend reading the book first for full context, otherwise you’ll be introduced to Lost Stars via a muddled mess.



Readers,

Do you have a question about writing, publishing, my stories, etc? Please feel free to post a comment or email me.
jimthewritingwizard@gmail.com
I’ll use those comments to select my next blog post.

I have been writing for several years, have 4 published works, experience with publishing and independent work, so I can hopefully be of assistance.
Please note, I only do one of these a day and will do my best to respond to everyone, but it may take some time.

You can also add me on Twitter!

Also, feel free to check out my works of Fantasy and Historical Fiction, Available on Amazon and where ever books are sold. See the link below:

http://www.amazon.com/James-Harrington/e/B00P7FBXTU

Thanks friends!
Catch you on the flip side!

-Jim